On reflection,

Even though I’m 19 years old, I am what someone would call a “late bloomer.” In fact, I’m still in the blooming process as I learn how to live less frustratingly without depression, obsessive compulsiveness, and perfectionism running my life. As I am playing catch-up with my peers, all of whom seem to have a clearer idea of how they want to present themselves, what they want to do, and how they deal with things, I try to make habits as I go instead of resolutions I might forget. Here are some habits I want to keep doing and how I can (hopefully) take them a step further:

  1. Journaling. I’ve always liked to write a diary, because it helps me take care of myself, become motivated to do things for the right reasons, remind myself that I sometimes make mountains about of molehills, and learn from my mistakes. I want to take this one step further with this blog and take ownership for what I write.
  2. Going to sleep. I will post about this more later, but I’ve been going to sleep at a healthy hour more regularly than I ever have. By that, I mean midnight or one or two hours after, but all-nighters? Never again. I learned that my body can’t handle the stress on top of actual stress caused by schoolwork. Now, all I need is to sleep at 10 AM to set my biological clock for second semester, when I plan on waking up at 6 (okay, maybe 7) in the morning every day to avoid studying at night, when I’m basically brain dead and miserable.
  3. Exercising. With the exception of all these holidays, I am going to the gym regularly, as a result, I must do 10 push-ups or more than 30 sit ups a day to get rid of the restlessness in my body. Hopefully, that can continue when I go back to school, since the gym would be all the way across campus, and I’m not sure if it will be a female only space like my gym in southern California.
  4. Talking to teachers, sort of. I’ve talked to teachers more than I did in the past, when I never talked to teachers ever. Something about teachers scared me, because of their humanness and their power over my grades. However, I learned that teachers are reasonable, and my therapist told me how Americans like self-advocacy. I took advantage of both and advocated for myself for research opportunities and answers to my questions about those opportunities. Although I haven’t gotten into the program I want yet and have been rejected from several research labs, I think corresponding with professors, even though I spammed biology professors from my local university one by one, has made me bolder, more confident, and more informed.

I hope these are all obtainable. What are the things that you want to keep doing right?


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